And another

I keep getting ideas, I've learned in most cases I should follow them if they make me feel good.
This is the most recent idea.

I have a few personal business ideas that I'm getting underway. I have read, learned, ignored, proven and now accepted that I shouldn't talk about these things to people that aren't ready to hear them - which is most people it seems. Friends / family aren't purposefully raining on my parade, I've learned that you look at things from your own perspective, you assess the new using your own learned history and respond accordingly. So if something feels scary to you, regardless if it has nothing to do with you, you'll exhibit your fear for the other person by trying to steer them away from the possible danger.

Unfortunately, if you the person with the idea hasn't firmed it up in your mind enough or your gut even, then you'll feel downhearted and scared after hearing other peoples perspectives, whereas before you were excited and hopeful. Sometimes you really did need to hear the stop hold on a minute speech, but in my opinion, you have your life and it's your own - as long as you're not purposefully hurting yourself or anyone else, and have made your decisions from a sound mind (not a knee jerk reaction to something) go live it. Obviously you don't want to throw yourself off of figurative or literal bridges without a bungee cord but how many of us really want to do that? Often our ideas are really clear and not risk heavy to us, but they are to so many people, and that's what holds us back.

My latest idea was to write my thoughts up using my pre existing open journal. Because, whilst I know all of the above, I really really really really really like talking and I'm struggling being silent. I used to have many diaries as a child but, I struggle to write pen to paper now (unless it's the gratuity journal at the end of the week). This way feels better to me as I'm effectively talking, and don't need to worry about if it's interesting or not. I get things off of my chest, and if it helps anyone then so be it. If not, that's fine too.

NB. I have, much to my chagrin been told by a very wise woman (Delia) that I should be more vulnerable (I dislike that word passionately due to my interpretation of it), but I understand what she means. It's being fully comfortable being my full me out loud all the time. I'm more me out loud than I have ever been, and when I'm with my closest friends all of me is present and happy, but even as I write this I've had thoughts about removing my picture from the other posts so that I can still stay a little bit hidden. Mad isn't it.

So off I go, another blog page, about me, all of me, and as scary as it is, I'm writing a book about me and if I can't do this, then I can't do that.